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update on my life... oh boy!

2007-04-09T15:26:00.000-07:00

After almost two months of not updating my blog, i have finally found the time to actually sit down and write about what's been going on with me (also becuase people have been bugging me as well!). These past few months have been filled with so much change and excitement and fear and fun all wrapped up together :)

TORF:
I decided to sign up for the Teacher's Overseas Recruiting Fair to see what opportunities would arise. I had no idea of the roller coaster weekend that it was going to bring! Looking back at this past year even from last May, it just amazes me to see how God's hand has worked in delicate and detailed ways.
Last May I did a placement teaching at an international school in Hong Kong. At first I wan't going to teach at this school, but things ended up being arranged for me to teach there. And here's where God really works in humourous ways! Two days after I arrived to teach, my host teacher broke his neck. As a reuslt, he was hospitalized and I was forced to teach all his courses. I remember being so stressed becuase of all the extra lesson planning. However, I found that I enjoyed the school and the students even more becuase of the situation. I left the school feeling like it was my home. I wasn't aware of it at that time, but God had already placed a burden on my heart for those students and the school. I saw so much potential in the things that those students could do. They were all so smart and talented! This "passion" became something that I tried to run away from. Maybe becuase I didn't want to move to HK, maybe becuase I didn't want to face it. haha, i remember discussing this with Ricky on many occassions. If it wasn't for him, I think I would have run away from God's calling altogether! thanks P!

Well, to make the story shorter, the same school ended up coming to this recruiting fair at Queen's. I tried my best not to think of that school and wanted to get interviews from other schools. But as it turned out, I ended up receiving an interview scheduled for the very last day of the fair. I had so many interviews during the weekend, that when i finally got to the HK interview I was just relieved to end the weekend. I was running on no sleep and no food becuase of my nerves. But in that interview, I felt God give me an overwhelming sense of peace. This was the most peace that I had felt in a long time. I heard his voice just reassuring me that He knew best. So I walked out of that interview grinning (almost like a dork!) haha....

God confirmed it with me a week later when I got an offer to go to Hong Kong. I am blown away by his plans for his children. I finally experienced what I had heard so much at Urbana about God's Calling. If God is calling you to do something, it doesnt' matter how impossible or how out of your comfort zone it will be, He will make it happen. This is probably the biggest lesson that I've learned in my life to date.

So, with that long story condensed into a short (hopefully coherent) version, I'm off to Hong Kong for two years. And what a coincidence, i think i have a boyfriend there right now... ;)

Placement:
I did a 4 week placement teaching Grade 7 and 8 in Newmarket. This was the most amazing experiences becuase i absolutely loved my host teacher. We got along so well and even went to hang out after school. You know you love your practicum when you spend more time with your host teacher! The students were amazing and i miss them so much. They were all so sweet becuase they gave me a "teacher survival kit" for when i start teaching next year. Even though the drive up to Newmarket was hell especially during ice storms, but it was all worth it :D

March Break:
Well, my march break was pretty relaxing. I got to spend some time with friends, make gourmet dinners and sketchy "apple blossoms". Also I was a coach for TC. That was the most tiring two days of my life. Just the energy and screaming that I did was incomprehensible. For people that know me, i'm usually not the loud type. But for TC I ended up trying to get my team all riled up that i lost my voice by the end. It was an awesome opportunity to serve especially the age group that I want to work with :) Praise God for all the work that He did in those two days!

UNICEF:
For the past 3 weeks, I did a placement at UNICEF Canada's headquarters in Toronto. Going into this placement, I was soo excited becuase this has always been my dream. I ended up working with the Manager for Education for Development. This was a perfect combination of my interests in teaching and my passion for international development. It was a blast getting to know everyone in the office. I met people who had been in Afganistan, UN representatives in other countries and UN ambassadors.
In addition, I was given a project to oversee, which was to create a teacher's manual for Deborah Ellis' new book "Our Stories, Our Songs"!! I couldn't believe it becuase I had heard of her before and i knew that her books were always so inspiring. So for the 3 weeks, my eyes were opened to the HIV/AIDS crisis in African countries such as Malawi and Zambia. I can honestly say that it was a life changing experience to work and produce this manual. There is so much crap that goes on in the world, especially to children. I know that I myself am one of those people who often turn a blind eye away from these situations. It often seems depressing and hopeless to think of others who are suffering immeasurable injustice, but i realized after doing this project, that even the little bit counts. The proceeds for the manual will go towards helping children with AIDS in Africa. Even though this money may not be a lot, in the end it will make a difference.
I think God taught me through this project and opportunity at UNICEF that in order for His work to be done, it doesn't necessarily always have to be in the form of missions or evangelical projects, but even non-religious organizations can be viewed as a ministry. Moreoever, even applying my knowledge on curriculum and teaching is a form of ministry.
By the end of the placement I had completed the book (by the grace of God!) and it looks like it's going to be 110 pages and counting more! woo hoo.. hopefully i'll get to see the published copy before i leave :)

Anywho, that was a shortened version of everything that's been going on in my life so far. Very jammed pack. hopefully these next few weeks in Kingston will be relaxing... haha... last time in Queen's (sniff) with the education peeps!!

Oh, and, i'd just like to congratulate jenny on her baptism... haha PAD loves you!!

UNICEF

2007-02-01T21:45:00.000-08:00

A couple of months ago, I began talking to the manager for "Education for Development" at UNICEF. I was very interested in her responsibility to help high school students become more aware of development issues and how to get them involved. It has always been a dream of mine to work for UNICEF/United Nations. I really believe that God has given me this opportunity to learn something new. There are so many issues in the world such as environmental degradation, sustainable drinking water in some areas, child poverty, child abuse that it might seem hopeless. But I really think that young people ESPECIALLY high school students have the energy and drive to make a difference. Often people think of high school kids as punks and dumb@sses with too much time on their hands. But I have seen the endless possibilities and potential that high school kids can have when they are motivated to do something. I think we need to encourage the "punks" in our high schools to make a difference. It's when people feel like they are making a difference that leaders are born.

just a quote about UNICEF which I love:
UNICEF is the world’s leader for children, working in 156 countries and territories to save, protect and enhance the lives of girls and boys. UNICEF supports child health and nutrition, promotes quality basic education, protects children from violence, exploitation and AIDS, and is the world’s largest provider of vaccines for developing nations. A global leader in emergencies with six decades of on-the-ground experience, UNICEF saves and rebuilds children's lives in natural disasters and conflict. UNICEF is funded entirely by voluntary contributions from individuals, businesses, foundations, schools, associations and governments.

On another note, I'm sooo thankful for my PAD girlies. they have really been a support system for me this year. It's so good to be with some girls who are so different from each other but yet we seem to understand and support each other. God has really blessed this group and accountability.

I found out that I'll be teaching Grade 8 in a couple of weeks in Newmarket. I'm excited to experience a new class and school. Hopefully it will give me a new perspective on teaching. Ahh, but before that, i'll be busy with applications and recruiting fair :S I know that God will work in his own way and in His own time. i'm just waiting. But sometimes it's so hard for me to be relaxed about my future. (maybe it's part of my type A personality --> i'm such a planner). Oh well, we'll see what happens.

And Ricky, if you're reading this... i miss you! haha... talk to you soon k?

some of my favourite pics of my favourite people... (in no particular order haha)

2007-01-24T20:36:00.000-08:00

hehe... what do you get when you put one egyptian, one korean and one chinese girl together? haha... MADNESS and lots of loooove... hehe, our jokes are always at another level. A level where I don't think I should type on this blog... haha... YELA and SA DANG HAE!!!

hehe... Kingston would not be as fun without the random outings and random events that happen on those outings. This has been a great year to watch ENDLESS hours of tv, cook, play games and chill with. Thanks girls and Peter! haha

"The Family"- from Agape to graduating university, we have seen each other grow in many ways. Whenever C and E get married, this will truly mark the milestone in our group. Haha, becuase it was when we used to hang out at First Markham that it happened! haha, i love the girls even though it's harder to see each other becuase of school. God bless!

My family. I thank God for them. They are always there to support me financially, mentally, spiritually. Truly a blessing from God.

OH Oxford House... we all started out not knowing each other in first year, but by the end of fourth year we had so many memories. Each one of us had a role to play in our beloved house. Judy as the house-maid who made sure everything was spotless and sterilized. Mel as the treasurer who made sure that we always had money. Elim and Gigi as the house bums... haha, both either playing games or watching tv. All I can say is that it was a pleasure to be your House Prez... haha... miss you girls!

For the past 3 years, this has been the source of my laughter, tears and growth. It's amazing how different we were but yet, I think that we have a way of filling in each other's weaknesses. I am so amazed at everything that we've been through. Distance is something that is only short-term as long as we are following God's calling. Thanks for everything P!

Friends forever... no matter how long we are apart, I can always count on having many laughs with these people. Truly a family to me.

I love playing mah jong with friends.. haha, truly one of my pastimes and it's the best with someone who makes fun of everything you do... haha... miss those times at the cottage :)

spirituality in education?!!

2007-01-22T19:09:00.000-08:00

For the past couple of weeks I've been taking a "Spirituality in Education" course. At first I wasn't interested in it, but then my housemate Doris and Angie were taking it and persuaded me to take it. It was quite interesting and different than any other course that i've taken before. We started out the class with a "Ritual" chant in a dark room with a candle in the centre. At first I was a little uncomfortable with this becuase I had never really seen myself being the "chanting" type of girl.
However, the issues that are brought up in this course have really helped me to reach deeper into myself and realize more about my character and personality. As a teacher, what is my personal philosophy about the spirituality of my students and the spiritual presence within my classroom? Do not mistake "spiritual" in a sense of a particular religion, but it is a more abstract concept that I'm still trying to grasp. How are students viewing life? Do they ever wonder about questions without answers? For example, some of the questions that we brought up were:

Why are some people so rich and others so poor?
Why am I here on earth?
What is my purpose?
Can I make a difference?

This last question was my favourite question becuase that's a question that I often ask myself.
I think that in order to answer this question "Can I make a difference" we must first determine what scale of difference do we want to make? Do we want to make a positive difference or a negative one? A lot of people who have made big differences have often never lived to see the results/impact of their actions. On a similar note, one small action can also make a big difference in others. These were just some of the things that got me thinking about what I want to do and the ways that we make a difference in this world.

on another random note, haha, for this course I have to learn a new skill. I choose to learn a new language. At first I wanted to learn korean. But my roommate Van persuaded me to learn Mandarin. Haha, so here we both are learning new languages. She's learning Korean and I'm learning Mandarin and it's HILARIOUS becuase we're both sitting in our rooms and reciting random words and noises... hehe

Urbana 06

2007-01-06T18:05:00.000-08:00

I remember contemplating whether to go to Urbana 3 years ago. My excuses were that it was too much money, i didn't think i would get much out of it and frankly I didn't want to waste my holidays away from all my friends and family. Well, God has a funny way of doing things and 3 years later, I found myself going to Urbana 2006. This was the best possible time for me to go to a mission's themed convention becuase I have more opportunities to think about long-term service and ways to serve God with my occupation.
I know i haven't blogged in a long time and for those of you whom I've vented or shared my frustrations/anxieties with, you'll know that in the past couple of months I've been struggling a lot in terms of big decisions for next year. I must admit that I'm a perfectionist who likes to plan ahead and know things ahead of time. I prepare for my future always in advance and like the feeling of being in control. In addition, I have always set out certain goals and dreams for myself to achieve (in terms of a career etc).
But after Urbana, I think God has really helped to confirm my fears and steer me in a different direction. I had always had plans to apply for grad schools for the coming year. It was my dream, my ambition and something that I was eagerly looking forward to. However, over the past couple of months, I have gotten signs from God, friends and family about different options. It really frustrated me that I was in a way "giving" up on things for God.
At Urbana, the theme was "Live a Life worthy of the Calling". God spoke to me in big and small ways to let me know that He has other plans for me, different than any I would have ever imagined. I don't know the details of where He is calling me exactly, but I have learned that the only response that I am able to give is "HERE I AM LORD". I was scared before about the uncertainties and lack of control that I had over my life, but now I understand more than ever that my life is in complete control. But instead it is controlled by God. I don't want to settle and make a name for myself. I don't want to say no to God. I don't want to wake up when I'm 60 and feel like I've accomplished absolutely NOTHING for the Kingdom of God. I want to say "Yes, Lord".

One thing that really touched me was when I went to a seminar on "Christians called to Journalism". The seminar speaker was a Christian journalist who wrote for magazines. He basically outlined the importance of maintaining integrity in your "secular" writing. I really was fascinated at the amount of influence journalism had on shaping public perspectives and opinions. I was overwhelemd to think of the many oppotunities to live out Christ in any occcupation, especially journalism. Then, a girl raised her hand and asked the speaker a question. She said that she was interested in fashion journalism and wondered how the fashion industry had any relevance to Christianity and whether it was a career path worthy of God's calling. Everyone in the room laughed and joked about her question. However, I thought that it was quite a legitmate question becuase I had thought of it before. The speaker thought for a brief second and answered the question in a simple way that spoke profoundly to me. He answered "There are many industries and professions in our society that are darkened and have no light of God within them. If you can find some way to look at the fashion industry as a place of ministry for God. To change the definition of beauty and elegance in our society, then that is a HUGE calling that is definitely worthy of God." It was then that I felt the passion in my heart to do something one day with my profession to please God. I want to have a profession where I will impact others and also shed God's light in the darkened corners of these industries. I don't know exactly where or when He will give me the opportunity, but that is what I will be praying for.

When looking back at the sermons and bible studies at Urbana, I have come away with one profound lesson. That is that God will use me wherever, whenever and however. All I have to do is say yes to Him.

One of the scariest days of my life... a true miracle

2006-11-30T21:04:00.000-08:00

well, i know if you guys are reading still... this blog has been untouched for almost a year! haha, sorry, but i've been too busy and neglecting this blog. Well, i guess now is the time to take it out and once again tell my random, maybe pointless stories.

Yesterday was a day that I will never forget. I'm currently teaching a high school in Toronto. I am starting to get used to being called "Miss Kwan" and have started coaching the girls volleyball team. It's amazing to see how some of the students have so much potential to become something great in the future. i can just see it in them. And as always, there will be those students who you just want to give a BIG wedgie for being brats (but that's another story :D).

This may sound cliche, but do you ever get any deja vues or "gut feelings" that something bad is going to happen? Well, on that morning, I was walking through the crowded halls of the school. And i thought to myself: "I wonder what I would do if there was ever a school shooting or hostage situation at this school?" I had this gut feeling that something was going to happen. But i just pushed it to the back of my head.

Anyways, there are 6 other Queen's teaching students that are teaching at the school with me. Usually we pick a day (Fridays) to meet up and have coffee at a nearby Second Cup. Well, this week, we had a meeting with the principal, so we decided to make our meeting on Wednesday and at an earlier time. As we were leaving the school for Second Cup, I had a sudden craving to try the new Tim Horton's Breakfast sandwich. So i told the rest of the gang that I would meet up with them at Second Cup.

I drove to Tim Hortons and bought the sandwich. Then i proceeded to the Second Cup. Well, 2 hours went by for our coffee date and we all got in our cars to drive back to school. As we were driving back, we found honestly DOZENS of police cars blocking off Yonge Street at every entrance to the sidestreets. I honestly thought that someone had died or gotten hit by a car. Well, it took 15 minutes to get back to school (what was supposed to be a 5 minute drive). When we got back to the school, I automatically went to the principals office for our meeting.

As we stepped into the office, I found a chaotic environent of students and phones ringing off the hook. Within a couple of minutes, we were informed that there had just been a Code Red in our school. Of course, I had never been through a Code Red before and asked what it was. Apparently there had been a bank robbery and bomb threat in the nearby plaza and the burglar was on the loose surrounding the school with a weapon. The school went into Code Red, which meant lights off, doors locked, windows closed, blinds closed and students hiding in a corner or under desks. This was scary stuff!! Some of the students were from war-torn countries and had to go through counselling after this procedure. But all that I could do was pray thankfully to God over and over again "Lord, thank you so much for protecting me and saving me!!!"

Later as I was talking with a teacher about the incident, she said that the bank that was robbed was right next to the Tim Hortons. The bank had been robbed about 10 minutes after I was there buying my sandwich. Wow. God really has his own plan for protecting his children. I was soo amazed and the perfect timing and miracle! God had really shown me his grace and mercy in protecting me from being in a possibly dangerous situation.
All I can say is that if you think situations like these are coincidences, they're definitely not. These are glimpses of God's miracles that ensure us that there is something greater than ourselves. Something Divine and All-Knowing.

my summer plans...

2006-04-04T13:21:00.000-07:00

i know this is a long due post... i've finally finalized my summer plans :)
may - june : doing a practicum at an international school in HK... hehe, hopefully i won't get eaten alive by those smart, rich international students...

june: i got a job! i'm going to be a director/co-ordinator for a richmond hill community centre for july and august!! hehe, i'm soo sad to leave harbourfront though. For the past 2 summer, harbourfront has been my summer life. I would get up at 6 am, take the GO train and come home at 6pm. I really had no life, besides Harbourfront. I never saw anyone else except for my co-directors. But now, i won't have to wake up early and i'll have a life!!! haha... the community centre is literally a couple of streets away from my house :) praise God!

and then after the summer, i'm off to final year of b.ED!! YAY!!! haha, congrats to those who have gotten their acceptances, wow, the world is going to be taken over by teachers!

hehe...

it's official... kingston is GHETTO!!!

2006-02-13T08:00:00.000-08:00

Over the past week, I have endured some pretty weird and ghetto episodes that can only be explained by saying "KINGSTON IS GHETTO!!!"

1) last week, it was raining really really hard. I was walking at night down the major street (Princess) with my umbrella. It was really windy so i was trying to block the wind with my umbrella. As I was walking, I saw two high school Kingston kids walked up towards me. They were kind of thugish, but i just ignored them. But then, as they walked past me, i heard a "SPLAT" on my umbrella. They started laughing and started running. I was like "WHAT THE?!??!!?" I decided not to chase after them. But then i looked at my umbrella and there was this nasty milky, yogurt substance all over my black umbrella!!!! it was sooo gross... this would NOT have happened in Toronto... in Toronto we have drive by shootings and muggings... but NEVER have i been thrown milk by someone!!! grrrr

2) Also last week, as i was walking on campus I saw 2 dead squirrels on the sidewalk. IN THE MIDDLE OF THE SIDEWALK!!!! it was also very very gross... since living in Kingston I have become deathly scared of the squirrels because kingston squirrels are bred differently and are way more hyper

3) So today, I had another squirrel incident. i was working in my room at my desk. I have a pretty tall window that faces my desk, so when i'm working at my computer, i'm also facing out my window. So i was working away, and all of a sudden I heard some scratching movement. i looked up out of my window and there it was... a DEAD squirrel hanging/stuck to the outside of my window (right in the middle of it too!!!) I screamed and ran out of my room and told my housemates to help. haha... elim took a picture of it.. and gigi got scared too. But then after a minute, we saw the squirrel move and I was soo relieved. It eventually climbed off my window, thank God! I don't know what i would have done if it was really dead and became a permanent fixture on my window... eew... gross.. imagine looking out your window every morning for the rest of the semester and seeing a dead/decayed squirrel... eew...

Sigh, kingston is very very ghetto... i can't wait to go back to toronto :)

chinese new year weekend and the horrible saleslady..

2006-01-31T06:20:00.000-08:00

this past weekend, i went home for chinese new year... mmm, every year i look forward to eating lots of yummy food at home! I stuffed myself until i couldn't feel my stomach anymore and then i would keep on eating....

Anyways, more of the reason i wanted to blog about my weekend was to vent about my encounter with the worst salesperson in the world!! On saturday, I went to farview with my mom and ricky to return a coat. But i also wanted to go to jean machine because they were having a big sale. So i walked into jean machine and a first saleslady came up to me and asked me
saleslady: "how are you doing today?"
me: "fine" (while looking down so hoping that she would notice that i just want to shop).
her: "so what are you doing this weekend?"
me: "nothing much, chinese new year"
her: "yeah, that's why i asked"

anyways, then she left me alone and said that if i needed any help to ask her.
but then another shorter girl came up to me and said
saleslady 2: "how are you doing today"
me: "fine"
her: "what are you doing this weekend?"
me: "sigh, chinese new year"
AND THEN... she started taking all these shirts off the rack and telling me about them... i just nodded politely and looked at other things on the jean racks. SHe literally started to follow me and whatever i touched, she immediately took them off the rack assuming that i was going to try on everything!! I just politely said, "oh sorry, i don't think i'm going to try on anything, i'm just looking today" BUT she still didn't get it!

She literally had like 4 pair of jeans in her hand! Then finally, i was walking away becuase i was kind of annoyed that i wasn't able to shop. She then was like "why aren't you trying on these?!!" in a kind of annoyed and mad tone. By this time, i was mad inside but still smiling on the outside. I told her nicely that i was just looking, but she was forcing me to try on things and gave me a dirty look saying that I should buy something. I felt soo trapped and ready to punch her in the face. Finally, Ricky came over and attempted to rescue me, but the saleslady still kept on going. Finally, i just said "thank you", turned around the left.

i could not believe how pushy and condesending the salesperson was!!! Even though it was chinese new year, she ruined the day for a good 10 minutes! I vow never to step foot in that jean machine again! But it was such a bummer because i was really interested in the jeans and the big sale... if she had not been so annoying and pushy, MAYBE i would have actually bought something! GRRRR... jean machine should learn how to train their employees so that they don't annoy their customers into leaving!!

anyways, that was my jean machine rant... thanks for listening :)

wierd stories

2005-12-17T08:35:00.000-08:00

i finished my exams on thursday.... and what a relief! hehe, but something funny happened in my exam. As i was writing in the middle of the exam, i looked up on my table and saw this medium sized spider (the ugly ones with white bodies and clear legs) crawling unto my exam paper. I tried not to scream (so it was sort of a muffled "umph!!"). I then decided to just brush it off with my hand. So i did. After i did, i looked to the girl sitting next to me... and then i realized that i had brushed the spider onto her boob!!! and she didn't notice! So i just tried not to laugh or reach over to touch her boob and continued writing my exam :) I think i've had enough spider swatting for quite a while haha

The next day, i was bored out of my mind... watched 3 movies (meet the fockers, mr. and mrs. smith, and a little bit of million dollar baby) and i also finished ALL the episodes of desperate housewives....

I decided to bake biscotti's from the new Martha stewart cookbook that my housemates gave me for my birthday (thanks guys!). But then i ended up burning wax paper in the oven. Am i the only one that doesn't know the difference between wax paper and parchment paper?!... haha, it was pretty funny, after i had put the wax paper with the cookies on top into the oven. My housemate was like "mmm, it smells like christmas and burning candles!!" And then i panicked and opened the oven which was starting to smoke up... hehe, it was kind of funny in the moment, but i guess i'm not that much of a martha stewart after all :)

Anyways, i probably won't be blogging until january, so i hope everybody has a MERRY CHRISTMAS and HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! EAT LOTS, drink lots and spend time with your family and friends!

Cheers!

wow... 21

2005-12-08T11:11:00.000-08:00

just reflecting the day after... i've finally acknowledged that i'm one year older and hopefully wiser? haha... but thanks to everyone for the birthday msgs, phone calls, cards, wishes, presents, serenades etc. They all really made my day something special. :D Even though i was in my room studying for most of the day, hehe

But mmm... now to describe the wonderful dessert party... where do i begin? i went out with mel earlier in the day to get all the desserts that i could find :) I am now officially hooked on the new ice cream flavour "apple pie" ice cream... oh my gosh... SOOO good! And when you serve it ontop of warm"dutch apple pie" mmmmm... it's soo heavenly

Then i also got raspberry mango cheesecake (very delicious, raspberry whipped cream on top of mango cheescake centre and the bottom was crunchy graham crumbs)

Judy had bought the new pumpkin cheesecake from Loblaws... it tastes soo good (like pumpkin pie and cheesecake in one)

We also had Bailey's Irish cream cheesecake from brown Helen... mmm....tastes like it sounds

Chinese "tong yun" seasame flavour cooked by Nicky and Judy

and finally Chocolate cake (bought by esther)....

So, as you can probalby tell, i had a sugar high.. hehe... and i also probably gained a few pounds... but hey, i guess being older means putting on a few pounds too!

i definitely have to have more dessert parties :)

i'm like a squirrel!!

2005-11-20T20:48:00.000-08:00

haha... i was a squirrel over the past weekend! I went back to toronto on thursday and i started stuffing my face/cheeks with food NON-STOP!!

thurday night - had sushi with my mom and had some quality "mom time" @ home baking muffins... mmm

friday - woke up, ate big breakfast, ate lunch with mom, went shopping, went to congee wong with dad & mom, went shopping @ first markam with them, had dessert with sam... mmm

saturday - lunch @ maison du japon with emily, amanda, esther, warren, adrian and sam... (oh man, it was fun catching up with you guys over many plates of those SHORT RIBS and pizza cakes... haha, which only me and sam ate!), shopping with esther and spurlging!, came home to hot pot :D

sunday - church, lunch, napped, worked (haha, very little though), went to T& T to get more food, and then back into the ole k-town!

*sigh, what a weekend of food, catching up and spending quality time with those that i haven't seen in a while. Hope to do it again but MORE during Christmas! :)

praying like it matters...

2005-11-10T14:35:00.000-08:00

“Have faith in God,” Jesus answered. I tell you the truth, if anyone says to this mountain, ‘Go throw yourself into the sea,’ and does not doubt in his heart but believes that what he says will happen; it will be done for him. Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins”

- Mark 11: 22-25

love styles....

2005-11-07T18:36:00.000-08:00

haha... for those of you who know, this semester i've been taking the infamous SEX CLASS in university. I actually have a midterm tommorow... and i'm sort of studying, but i found something really insightful that i thought i'd blog about. Although there are MANY things i could blog about my sex class... but i guess this is a censored site? haha... just jokes!

The Greek literature defined different love styles:

1) Eros - romantic, passionate love
2) Ludus - playful, permissive, game playing love
3) Storge - friendship love
4) Mania - possessive, dependent love
5) Pragma - practical love
6) Agape - selfless love

Apparently, the majority of males engage in ludus (game playing love) whereas females prefer more pragma and mania love. Interesting eh? No wonder people always say that guys and girls view relationships differently at times. hehe...

anyways, back to studying, although this helped me study :)

finding yourself...

2005-11-05T21:38:00.000-08:00

one of the most insightful things that have occured to me lately... came from the series finale of "Sex and the City". Here's the excerpt of the ending of the show that really has a lot of meaning to what is shaping my life lately :)

“Later that day, I got thinking about relationships

There are those that open you up to something new and exotic

Those that are old and familiar

Those that bring up lots of questions

Those that bring you somewhere unexpected

Those that bring you far from where you started

And those that bring you back

But the most challenging, exciting and significant relationship of all,

Is the one you have with yourself

And if you find someone to love the “you” you love

Well… that’s just fabulous!!”

- Carrie Bradshaw "Sex and the City"

expensive hair... is it really worth it?

2005-10-23T19:51:00.000-07:00

a couple of days ago I was @ shoppers drug mart (one of my favourite places to shop... haha) and i came across the marc anthony hair product line and they were 50% off!! usually, i never really use salon hair products because i'm either too lazy, or it's too expensive. But i decided that since it was such a deal, that i would splurge and treat my hair ;)

I spend almost 30 minutes trying to figure out which one to buy... boy, they have different product lines (curly, straight, thickening, blonde, brunette, red etc)... so finally i bought around 3 products and meanwhile i bumped into my friend and she was so excited about the sale that she bought 6 or 7 products

My hair purchase really got me thinking about what i usually spend on my hair and whether it was worth it to spend more money on my hair. I always thought that it was the "marketing" of certain products that made them more expensive. When i got home, i jumped into the shower to try my new 60 second hair mask... it was WONDERFUL!!! haha... i've never felt my hair that soft before!!!

Yeah, so that's my hair blogging... here's a list of my recommended shampoos and hair products:

1) Nioxin cleanser and conditioner - for my extreme loss of hair, it's minty and makes your head tingle (but VERY VERY expensive)

2) Marc Anthony - Simply Straight 60 second mask and spray (it makes your hair soft and straighter)

3) Marc Anthony - Thickening effect hair cream... mmm smells good... i just wanted to eat it instead of putting it on my hair :D

Anyways, this is probably one of the most random bloggings ... but i really really had to express my new found love for hair products... hehe
3) Marc Anthony -

my thanksgiving weekend and more..

2005-10-20T06:22:00.000-07:00

i know it's a little late to blog about my thanksgiving... but i've been busying with post thanksgiving essays and midterms. Well, my thanksgiving was different this year becuase it was the first year i stayed in kingston instead of going back to toronto. The weekend was filled with studying, swimming, working out... and finally... a CRAZY dinner at the julie's house!! hehe, i don't think i've EVER seen such a big turkey and mmmmm... goood pumpkin pie!! in a way, it was kind of like a family thanksgiving dinner for me :D thanks julie!

On another note, can you believe that it's already october? I kind of wished it were april though... hehe, i just want school and my undergrad to be over with. Although i know what i'll be doing next year, i'm REALLY REALLY excited for my practical year... i'm anticipating to do a lot of new things, to learn how to REALLy be a teacher and to find my skills that i can teach others about. Not to mention, i'm looking forward to living in some random old lady's basement for half the year ;)... fun times!

Today i had an 8:30 seminar and i woke up @ 9... i didn't really think much about skipping it becuase participation counts for your mark. So i jumped out of bed, put random clothes on, glasses and a piece of gum (i know, GROSS!) and RAN out the door... i ran up to princess and division when i realized that by the time i got there, class would be almost over... *sigh, so i just went back home... WHY DIDN'T i REALIZE that WHEN I WAS STILL IN BED?!?!?!? i could have slept some more!!! sheesh....

hehe...

STEPH"S TV SHOW LIST:
Tuesday - Amazing race with Gigi
Wednesday - Martha Stewart Apprentice (reviews from Emily)
Thursday - Survivor, Apprentice, ER (3 HOURS BABY!!!!)

So these are the shows that keeps this girl sane during the weekdays... on weekends, it's fun times with R... or the usual studying...anyways, i'm out... gonna get back to sleep. :D

(drumroll) and... I'm BACK!!!!!

2005-10-07T11:14:00.000-07:00

haha... wow, has it been this long since i've updated this page?!?! Sorry, for the months of idleness on this page... i was crazy busy over the summer, plus my wireless intenet at home decided to crash on me...

does anybody still read blogs?! or maybe that's just me...
I'm extremely bored because all my housemates have just left for Thanksgiving... this will officially be the first thanksgiving away from home (sigh, i miss it already!!) But my profs had to schedule exams the day after thanksgiving... grrrr... no consideration at all!

Did anyone watch survivor or apprentice yesterday?!??! haha... i can't believe that I watch 3 hours of tv STRAIGHT on thursday nites.... I just have to put in my favs on apprentice (just for traditional Steph blogging material): I LOVE RANDALL.. i think he's my favourite... and I never really liked rebecca until yesterday's episode when she really impressed Trump enough to fire the other girl (who i thought was about to cry in the boardroom). Apparently Randall has 4 or 5 university degrees in engineering, MBA, Law, science etc... WOW... something about educated men really attracts me... hehe ;) or maybe i'm just in love with a nerd...

Anyways, on another random note, I've been feeling really sluggish for the past week becuase i haven't been able to work out b/c i sprained my ankle. I think it was the stupidest reason for spraining my ankle too!! I was on a geography field trip where we were walking around kingston at night. THere were sooo many misquitos and flies! and when i was walking on grass, i stepped into a pit and "CRUNCH" went my ankle.. *sigh* i think i'll try swimming for exercise until my ankle gets better

oh yeah... HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAD and MOM!!!! love ya!

yeah, this is my random thoughts for today... so until next time.... see ya!

blog or xanga?!

2005-04-21T06:45:00.000-07:00

well, as some of you have seen, recently when i was in the middle of studying for an exam, I started a xanga. I don't know which one to write in now!! i've updated it a couple of times and i think i'm going to alternate between them (hehe...), or i could just copy and paste the posts and load them on both pages?! :D

yesterday i finished an exam and i came home and watched 3 movies straight!! one after another!! i looove movie marathons all by myself hehe. I watched "maid in manhattan", "while you sleeping" and "troy"... hehe, i really liked troy!!! i should have watched it sooner :D

I hope exams are going well for everyone (even for those who are already finished by the time they read this). It's really amazing to think that I'm almost done my 3rd year at Queens. When looking back, it just seems like yeterday when I was still at PCA in high school (especially doing tea runs, having spares in the afternoon and going to bayview village etc). God has brought me so far from then. He has taught me so many new things about my gifts, my passion and his love and mercy for me. Sometimes I fail to appreciate all the little things that God does in my life that determines the course of my life path. He is the potter and I am the clay. I know that He is still not finished with me yet and trust me, He won't be for a long time.

Something that I've been thinking about lately and have struggled to learn: to have faith in where God is going to take me in the next few years. I guess you could say that i'm always impatient in that I want to know at least some direction of my future (whether grad school, working, going overseas to teach after graduation etc). But when looking back on all the major milestones that I've gone through in my life, God has revealed himself with his own time and his own sense of humor. Yes, that's right, God has a sense of humor too. It's kind of funny becuase sometimes I will feel like i have been running around in circles with myself until God finally decides to stop me and show me His will (or maybe i just wasn't attentive to it in the beginning). Hehe, it remindes me of myself when I used to watch my hamster run on his "treadmill wheel thingie". I would sometimes put my finger to STOP the wheel and the hamster would be so clueless and in awe of why his treadmill stopped. I guess that's the same with God, he watches us constantly and can intervene anytime he wants :D

So anyway, I was talking to my mom about my impatience about wanting to see the future NOW. And she had a way of assuring me that not knowing exactly where God is going to take you is part of building a stronger relationship with God. It really hit me that I don't have to worry about marks to get into grad school, I don't have to worry about struggling to find a job after I graduate... it all doesn't matter! I should actually be excited that I'm not in control of my life, and completely TRUST that God will know where and when to reveal his plans for me.

whew, so that's my lesson of the month i guess :) hope exams are all good! (and if you have exams, STOP READING THIS AND GO STUDY NOW!!!!!)

The Apprentice review (again)

2005-04-15T17:02:00.000-07:00

yesterday's apprentice was interesting becuase this was the first time that i thought chris didn't do that bad of a job. For those of you who know my view on chris, I wished he had been fired a long time ago. But yesterday's episode, I felt that Chris should have stayed. Even though Trump kept on saying that chris has always been losing, I think that he could have had some potential too.

I think Trump favours Alex TOO much... is it becuase he has the "apprentice look" of being the white male that's highly educated (similar to Bill Rancic and Kelly)??? I really hope that a girl wins it this season.. it would be really nice to see a female apprentice (YAY!!)

But out of the girls (Tana and Kendra), i seem to like Tana better for some reason.. although she slacked off on the task, i think she has more leadership qualities than kendra. I absolutely HATE craig and bren... eew, just EEEW!!! they both don't really do anything outstanding to me...

sigh, is it just me, or is this season's apprentice candidates not as good as the previous seasons'??!?

school... is SOO overrated!

2005-03-31T11:55:00.000-08:00

*sigh... i'm almost burnt out.... struggling to get through the next week.. actually, the next month. this week has been the more CRAZIEST week for me ever! i can't believe that i have so many essays and assignments and finals even in the last week of classes :( I really really really need strength.... but even in the midst of all this work, its funny that i've still been able to find time for myself. Maybe it's the procrastination attitude kicking in, but i've honestly had more quiet time for myself and God than before :P so, my blog ends with a good note... hahaha

remembering...

2005-03-26T20:44:00.000-08:00

With every second, Jesus swallows more of mankind's sin.
Every disobedient deed, every lustful stare, every evil longing
Every act of hatred, every transgression ever perpetrated and
Every sin yet to be committed
Flows like poison into his very soul
sip after sickening sip
until he drains the dregs of the cup
In this drinking, the depravity of sin encompasses Christ

He who has never known sin becomes sin
Darness oozes in and around him and clutches at his soul
its tentacles dragging him down into the swirling waters of Satan's domain

The light of the world is extinguished on a hill called Calvary
Men who love darkness rather than light demand a sign,
and God gives them a sky that matches the blackness of their own hearts.
No greater horror has ever existed in the history of the world than this day when
darkness fell upon the land.

the unthinkable...

2005-03-24T12:30:00.000-08:00

oh gosh... today the UNTHINKABLE happened to me... when i was walking home from school, i passed a tree and i though i felt something touch my hair... i looked at my hair and it was fine... nothing really... a thought came across my head "wouldn't it be funny if a bird pooped on me?" haaha... so there I was, very happy that nothing had happened to me....

when i got home... i took off my jacket and saw a huge white crusty stain on the back of my jacket... *sigh, a bird did poop on me :( i hope he's happy now... grrrr

laughing in my sleep

2005-03-23T14:11:00.000-08:00

i originally wanted to take a 20 minute nap this afternoon... not good, becuase it turned into an hour and half nap :) I love those naps! Anyway, i'm not sure if this has happened to anyone before, but it has happened to me ALOT! I was sleeping and then I subconsciously heard myself giggling and laughing in my sleep. It was so loud that I woke my self up from giggling too hard. It was sooo weird!!! No wonder my abs hurt when I wake up, its probably from all that laughing that i'm doing while i'm asleep... maybe i should get some help?

just on another side note, why is my blog called "steph's room of slight predicament" havoC? huh? haha... hope loo is well for havoc and princess (haha, i think its funny that you're actually nicknamed that!) can't wait until exams are over and we can all chill in toronto for some good ole family times!

I'm soo excited for the summer now! i found out last week that I'm going to be doing the summer job that I wanted to do.... no more nerdy science camp director... haha... now i'm director of chess, film animation, second city improv, dance and dungeons and dragons (call me a SUPER DORK DIRECTOR!!) haha... but i'm soo excited becuase that means i'll be able to do so much more stuff and get to go to my off site camps to visit. I've never been to the National Ballet Academy and I can't wait to go see all the pretty ballerinas and famous dancers!

haha.. speaking of famous dancers, last year, Jennifer Fornier (ack!) always came to Harbourfront and one day, she came up to me and asked me if she knew me from somewhere becuase I looked really familiar.. i was like "um, no" and she said that she thought I was a dancer.. haha.. yeah right! but i thought it was cool to talk to her becuase my friend robyn was drooling and nearly fainting beside me :P

Has anyone from RHCCC been doing the Easter week devotionals that they gave us last sunday? I'm finding it very good and insightful! there are some things in the passages that I have never really thought about before or noticed... I love it when i can find more insight into passages that are read over and over... GOd never fails to teach us new things everyday :P

Well, i should get back to my work... within the next two weeks I have: 5 essays/term papers, and 2 final exams... then it's off to my other final exams until april 29th... *sigh... please be over soon...

The apprentice review

2005-03-10T19:03:00.000-08:00

for those apprentice fans out there... just a few thoughts on this weeks episode:

1) One of my biggest pet peeves... is male chauvinsts... men who think that they rule the world, that women are just pretty faces and objects of affection with no individuality or intelligence.. men who look down on other people, are arrogant, those who can't stop talking about how great they are.
Anyway, I was so relieved and happy when John was fired this week... i've been wanting him to get fired a LONG time ago... He's such a jerk! Everytime he tried to sell his stuff to the music artists by talking about himself... just contributed more to his "idiot factor". So i must applaud Mr. Trump for his wise decision on firing John this week

2) The person I want to get fired next week: Chris. Was it just me, or does Chris seem very demeaning and rude when he talks to other people, ESPECIALLY mr. trump, carolyn and george? Plus, he chews tabacco... while in a clown suit playing with children (what more can I say?)

3) my favourites: Erin, Craig, Angie ( i think these three know how to speak and present themself in a really professional manner when in the boardroom... i'm not too sure if Erin is going to make it to the top two.. but i still like her... plus she has cool sunglasses ;)

hahah... on another note, I thought it was pretty funny when mr. trump told the winning team that they wouldn't get a reward becuase they got the "biggest reward of all" by raising money for charity... you could just see the dissapointment on the people's faces when they heard that... just goes to see how materialistic these people can be... materialistic, but VERY interesting to watch :)

Can't wait until next week... just call me the apprentice obsessor :P

Pking just isin't fun

2005-03-09T05:44:00.000-08:00

Oh man, a few days ago, there was freezing rain and all the sidewalks were ICED over. So elim and I were at the gym playing a volleyball game. When we walked outside, we decided to take the shortcut out the back where there was a huge flight of stairs. BAD IDEA. As soon as a stepped on the steps, I pked and slid all the way down. haha... and elim was at the bottom of the stairs laughing :) I think Queen's should be responsible for the safety of their students especially on campus property... i'm not impressed...

Anyway, on a brighter note... i'm excited because my bro is coming up to queens to visit me today! He's going to be staying for a couple of days just to see the campus... to be honest, i really don't know what to show him or take him to... there's nothing really to do in Kingston

the start of my weekend

2005-03-03T14:36:00.000-08:00

my weekend has officially started... i know, it's only thursday...:)
I'm just glad for a rest although i have been getting a lot of it this week. I got back the midterms that I had the week before reading week and I'm pretty happy with the results. I guess when receiving my marks, I have to constantly remind myself that those marks are not only a reflection of what I know or studied, but also God's grace to me. I guess I have personally learned the lesson throughout these many years of schooling that God ultimately has the power to give you the things that you want, whether they are academic marks, relationships, summer jobs etc. It's humbling to think that me as an individual, is nothing more than a blank slate for God to use in this world. I am humbled, but grateful.

I went to work out with elim today and we ran on the track above the rink. Honestly, I'm not trying to bash my school or anything, but our athletic facilities are worse than prison facilities!! We only have one small track and it has to be right above the arena. So people are running in the cold arena atmostphere. And to make it worse, the track is so narrow that if you want to pass somebody, you have to literally squeeze against the wall. There hardly ever any treadmills available and half of them are always "out of order" hehe, I was on the stair master machines today and I discoverred why they are all positioned to face the wall. Becuase when you exercise on those machines, your butt basically protrudes out!! I felt so vulnerable ;)

Another funny story about butts, I was standing outside the lower studio where there was an aerobics class in progress. i was standing next to this guy who was also watching the 40 girls in the class. The girls were doing squatts and lunges facing us... and then all of a sudden the guy besides me turns to me and says "hmmm... i like THAT one!! I like this view"... i was thinking in my head "EXCUSE ME?!??!?! stop checking out these girls!!! they're not doing the squats for you!!" anyways, I just gave him this weird look and walked away... *sigh, when will guys ever learn? :)

Anyway, I can't wait until Apprentice tonight.. i haven't watched the last two episodes and I have to catch up!! haha, i know, "don't call me from 9-10pm" policy for veilside :P Until next time....

post reading week..

2005-03-01T13:06:00.000-08:00

sorry to those who check my blog once in a while and have told me to update my blog... haha, i guess i've been busy lately ;) I guess i'm not like SOME people who have the time to update their blogs daily... hehe

*sigh, so this is the week after reading week... and i'm actually doing a lot more reading than i did during the actual week. Reading week was good though, I came home thursday, ricky took me to see the toronto symphony orchestra :D (which was awesome!). On friday, I basically had a lazy afternoon watching movies and then I went to one of the best restaurants EVER... haha, i even tried raw oysters for the first time and i didn't get diarehha afterwards!!

Saturday and sunday were spent mostly with my parents and my brother going out to eat, shopping, and just hanging out at home. It was good to just spend some time with them because I haven't had that since christmas. Oh yeah! the whole weekend was also dedicated to watching 30 hours of this really good chinese soap opera.. haha, my eyes were sooo sore afterthat!! I think it's more addictive to watch those soap operas on dvds because there are no commercials to give you a break and also I end up just watching them all together... haha, call me an obsessive freak :D

the rest of the week was spent doing work mostly during the day and going out at night. Catching up with old friends, going out for dinner, shopping at vaughn mills with carol and kelly, hot potting, bubble teaing, the "animal game" (hahah, i haven't laughed that hard in a long time.... aww, i miss family fun times!!!)

Yeah, so basically, that was my week of relaxing and fun... i know, it doesn't really measure up to SOME people who spent the week in sunny cuba, but i enjoyed it :)

Laziness and procrastination at its best

2005-02-14T10:16:00.000-08:00

i woke up around 6 am this morning becuase I really really had to go pee, and then after that I couldn't go back to sleep. So I ended up going to my 8:30 lecture, to find that it was only 10 minutes long!! *sigh, then i trudged back home almost collapsing of exhaustion. When I got home, I decided to take a 30 minute nap... DANGEROUS... it turned into a 2 and a half hour nap. But nevertheless, it felt very good just to get some rest.

So i'm trying to study for my mid term exam that's tonight, but i'm constantly getting distracted... i just hope i'm able to get SOME studying done before the exam.. haha

and it begins....

2005-02-09T15:55:00.000-08:00

I've just officially started this blog because Elim told me to do something better with my time rather than just going on Friendster. So here it is, TA-DA!!!! STEPH"S BLOG!! Hopefully, i'll be able to update this more often than just once a month, haha (for those of you who know me, my internet, e-mailing, msning is very unreliable).

Anyways, Happy Chinese New Year everyone!!! I forgot to wear red, or new underwear or eat chinese new year food.... but i guess that's becuase i'm in Kingston right now :) I can't wait until I'm back in Toronto and I can eat all the food that I can get my little hands on. Whenever I go back to Toronto, it's like I'm a totally different person with an extra stomach. It's actually quite remarkable becuase I can eat so much and still not be hungry. But once i'm back in Kingston, I'm back to the canned soup, canned tuna, and instant noodles (MMMM).

I'm extremely sore from working out today. I went to an aerobics class on monday and the instructor was like a athletic NAZI!!! I woke up yesterday morning with this incredible pain in EVERY muscle of my body. I'm not kidding!! my legs, butt, ankles, arms, cheek, neck, back and abs are all pretty sore right now... But that didn't stop me from working out again today ;)
I think that i'm starting to get addicted to working out... is that bad? I mean, I just don't feel right whenever I don't work out or if I miss a day... This is such a change from my motivation to work out a year ago. If you asked me a year ago to go to the gym, I would have ran away, LITERALLY...

Anyways, I'm going to get back to my essays that are due TOMMOROW... hehe, I'm a slacker, I know...